Double Your Failure
Let’s start this post off with a quote from arguably the worlds greatest basketball player, Michael Jordan. I want you to read it carefully and take it all in:
When you read this quote, the old NLP principle ‘there is no failure only feedback’ comes to mind. Realise this: everybody, even the greatest, have days when it just does not happen for them.
Does not matter how hard they try, it just won’t happen for them.
Hell, I even have the occasional ‘off-day’ myself. A fact I’m not afraid to admit.
You hear so many ’so called gurus’ saying that you should be able to pick up any girl, any time. On the whole that is a good attitude. You just have to realise that you will have days where it just will not happen. The ‘gurus’ often seem to neglect to mention this point.
We all have days where we’re not feeling our best, and stuff we try just bombs. We feel the weight of the world on our shoulders. It’s not bad, its just the natural order of things. The ebb and flow of human emotions.
I’m not trying to depress people here. I just want you to know that you will need to go through the wringer a few times before coming out dry the other end. If Michael Jordan can’t be the best he be can every time, then how can you expect to be?
Don’t battle with yourself. The more you struggle, the harder the fight becomes.
How to use this to improve your life…
You can learn more about who you are, and how far you have come, by the way you react to these negative experiences. Here is another Michael Jordan quote. I don’t get paid every time I mention him, though you should defo go buy some Nike Air Jordans, they are the awesomest :-) Here’s the quote:
A real-life example of applying this:
I was out with a friend from work. He is a pretty cool guy. He said he hated the fear of rejection and that it made him feel depressed. With such negative thoughts going through his head, no wonder he did not want to approach. I told him to look for all the positives of any interaction and to realise where he may be going wrong.
We were out the other evening, and he approached two girls sitting at a table in a bar. He sat down with them. He started talking, when one interrupted him saying, “I can’t hear you.” Without hesitation, he told her to lean in. Boom, she did as she was told. Good girl.
Then he wanted to do a magic trick for them. He held his hand out and told them to do the same. The same girl said, “Are you f**cking serious?”. He looked at her and calmly said, “Do you wanna have fun?”. Once again, she stuck her hand out and followed his every word.
Then the girl got real bitchy because she could not figure out how he did the trick. He refused to tell her, and kept his cool. This was the strongest negative reaction he had experienced in over six years of performing magic for people.
Anyway, she started to get her knickers in a twist and told her friend she was going. Her friend just sat there until she was literally dragged up.
He came out of the interaction happy and buzzing with energy, *not* feeling bummed-out and depressed (even though he had been ‘rejected’). He had told this girl what to do, and she did it. He realised he made a few errors and that he may be able to ‘tame the beast’ if a similar situation were to arise in future.
He learned so much more from this one experience than he would have done if he never walked over, and had the balls to just go for it.
So get out there and double your failure. You might just double something else at the same time.
Speak soon,
David Black
image: Diana Pinto
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David Black
